R. Grossman, a question for you from Eretz Yisrael, based on the parsha a child does not become a ben sorer umoreh until he steals from both his father and his mother. Why from both, is it not enough that he would steal from one of them?
love your style! looking forward. Berel.
The Ruv answers:
The heylige Oisvorfer is pleased to receive comments from all over the world and especially so from people he has never met or spoken to; lately that’s kimat everyone. Nu, your question, repeated verbatim just below, was taka excellent ober avada there is a teretz (answer), likely many. Let’s try these on for size.
Indeed they heylige Toirah does state that a child does not become a ben sorer umoreh until he steals from both his father and his mother. And taka why?
Seemingly, if the weisneheimer child shows disrespect to but one of his parents and is a total michutzif and worse to the other, this is epes a clear indication that something is wrong with that particular relationship. Perhaps that parent is too stern or not stern enough –ver veyst- and the child feels he has a friend and not a parent. Or farkert, efsher the relationship has soured sufficiently because the parent was epes too harsh, beat the child down psychologically see below). Say a few experts (so called) azoy: if there is something wrong in the child’s attitude towards a certain parent, the fault lies in the parent and not in the child. Shoin! Ober in order to be labeled or qualify (sic) for ben sorer umoreh status, the child must steal from both parents. This universal disrespect signifies that the fault lies in him and not in his parents.
Another pshat: stealing from but one parent, shows that the child wants to take revenge on that parent. Efsher the parent didn’t show the child enough love, and the child wants to get attention by stealing. Stealing or aggression towards one parent, is not an indication that something is wrong with the child.
The Oisvorfer Ruv